From this day forth, I will grow an impeachment beard as a sign of wooly protest against our heinous administration.
The fervor of my disgust shall be matched only by the scraggliness of my facial hair.
I will not shave until Bush is impeached for crimes committed against the American people.
I call on all my brethren to do the same.
Friends, relatives, Americans...send me your beards!!
Well, now it's finally official, folks. According to AP news, Bush has killed as many Americans as Osama. But look how far we've come. I guess it's true: two wrongs really do make a right.
6600 Iraqi civilian deaths in July & August. Woohoo!!! We broke the record! Way to go! U! S! A! U! S! A!
Please for the love of God come to my standup show this Friday 8/25!
This morning I saw a car with a bumper sticker that read: "FEAR THIS!" in all caps like that, next to a picture of an American flag. A Buck, I think it was. Or a Pontiac. In the window above it was a decal of Calvin (the cartoon character) kneeling in prayer before the Cross, so I'm assuming the sticker wasn't meant to be taken in an ironic, anti-war kind of way. Rather, I think the bumper sticker was meant for the terrorists themselves. That it's meant as a warning to the terrorists that they better back off and start fearing America and all it stands for. Which is odd considering they don't even fear dying. Seem pretty darned bent on it, actually. So my guess would be fear is not one of our best weapons when it comes to dealing with terrorists. I mean, you gotta admit, our harps and angels and poofy clouds don't hold a candle to 72 virgins, especially when you've been staring at burkas your whole life.Today, the Bush administration drafted amendments to the War Crimes Act that would retroactively protect policymakers from possible criminal charges for authorizing any humiliating and degrading treatment of detainees.
Finally recovering from a three-year stint in medical school, I recently completed my tenure as Managing Editor for National Lampoon. My work has appeared in Playboy, Nerve, and The New Yorker where I was featured in Talk of the Town. I have written for Comedy Central, G4TV, the Food Network, and Prairie Home Companion. As a writing fellow at the University of Massachusetts, my fiction was twice awarded the Harvey Swados prize.
